T.J. Dillashaw wants to set the facts straight on the Chris Holdsworth incident.
For years, Dillashaw has taken the bulk of the blame for Holdsworth’s career ending in 2014, when the two were still training partners at Team Alpha Male in Sacramento, Calif. As the story goes, Dillashaw and Holdsworth were sparring and Dillashaw caught Holdsworth with a knee that left him badly concussed, a recurring condition that eventually forced Holdsworth out of competition for an indefinite amount of time.
The deeper details change depending on who is telling the tale, but Dillashaw has always maintained the incident was a freak accident, while Holdsworth and his teammates have frequently painted Dillashaw as a bully.
On Dominick Cruz’s Love & War podcast, Dillashaw was asked about the incident, and he shared his opinion of Holdsworth’s demeanor before answering.
“Holdsworth was a guy that came into the gym and he’s insanely good,” Dillashaw said. “Like, very, very good, his grappling was the best. Like he’s the best I’ve ever worked with. Unfortunately, he didn’t have that competitive mindset. Like, when he first came in the gym, he could have went pro right away and he would find reasons not to fight and not want to do it. He didn’t have that killer instinct in him. And so he was always looking for a way out.”
Holdsworth looked to be a future bantamweight contender after dominating his season of The Ultimate Fighter in 2013 and then improving to 6-0 as a pro with a win over Chico Camus at UFC 173. However, following his training mishap with Dillashaw, he never fought again.
One thing Dillashaw wants to make crystal clear is that any version of the story that has him intentionally harming Holdsworth in such a way that it would be detrimental to Holdsworth’s career is purely false.
“I remember we were both getting ready for my Renan Barao fight, he was also fighting on that card against Chico [Camus], and I hit him with an overhand right in boxing and ever since then, he had been dealing with concussion stuff,” Dillashaw said. “He cuts a lot of weight, so he had to cut early throughout camp, I think that affected him a little bit.
“The stories are being said, we were in sparring in MMA, he shoots his shot, I stuff it and he’s coming to stand up and I go to throw a knee. I’m thinking I’m going to hit him in the chest, he’s standing up, he goes back down and I knee him in the head. It was an illegal blow and I felt horrible about it. It wasn’t like I maliciously went out and kneed him, people are saying in the back of the head. How am I kneeing him in the back of the head? There’s these things that were getting blown out of proportion because I left the team and they want to make me look as bad as possible.”
Dillashaw officially parted ways with Team Alpha Male in 2015, though he had already been training apart from the group with coach and close friend Duane Ludwig. It was a compensation dispute between Ludwig and Team Alpha Male that was the impetus for he and Dillashaw leaving the group for good, and had nothing to do with Holdsworth’s injury, according to Dillashaw.
Cruz also supported Dillashaw’s overall training attitude, suggesting that fighters accept a certain level of risk when they prepare for a fight at the highest level.
“I’m a very competitive guy,” Dillashaw said. “With everything I do, I always want to win. I want to win every round, ever since wrestling. I didn’t want to get taken down in practice. I get pissed if I get taken down in practice. Sometimes that gets the best of me and I want to go harder, and I want to go harder, and then he goes harder, and then you’re in a room full killers and everyone just keeps going harder and harder and harder, and then when you get the better of someone you’re the bad guy.
“And we’re training for world title fights. We’re not wrestling. We’re not playing chess. We’re playing a contact sport that bad things can happen.”
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